Gabby Writes

My last post made me realize that I may not be doing as mentally well as I thought. I was going to make a little post to, like, dive deeper into it but then A TREE HIT MY FUCKING HOUSE. The old one, not the new one.

So, yeah, I’ve been a little stressed.

My husband was upstairs for bed and I was downstairs in the living room with the cat, watching TV. It was storming outside, and silly me sat there with no worries since the power rarely goes out at this house and none of the trees in the backyard have ever fallen before. Suddenly, there was so much noise. I could hear something hitting the roof and a loud boom. For a brief moment, I thought a tornado was going by the house. The cat had already run upstairs by the time I heard glass break.

As you can see, there’s a whole part of the kitchen area that’s all glass. Luckily, only one pane of it broke.

My husband called down to make sure I was OK. I told him a tree hit the house and he said, “I know.” Because tree also hit the master bathroom.

A hole was punched right through the shower, and the branch that landed in the bath tub stabbed through the wall.

This all happened at around 10 or 11 o’clock. We just kept the door to the master bathroom closed, but we had to deal with the broken glass and whatnot. My husband’s parents and sister came over to help deal with some of the tree. Some of it had to be cut away before the hole could even be covered up. I was so anxious because it was all dark and wet out while they were doing this. We didn’t get to bed until about four that morning.

They came back the next day, along with my dad, to cut up more of the tree. This was also when we really got to see what it looked like from the outside.

So, yeah, not looking too good. I did a lot of crying because everything was starting to get to be too much. I need a break from bad things happening. Surely the universe has to be done fucking me over, right? I feel like I’m owed it.

Anyway, tree removal people will be coming tomorrow and roof people on Thursday. They’re replacing the whole roof. Some branches went through into the attic, but thankfully didn’t hit any support beams. But it’s a lot of money to fix the roof. We spent a lot of money on the wedding and the new house, so we had to take out a loan. So, it’s all pretty overwhelming.

I’m afraid if one more bad thing happens, it might break me. Sometimes it feels like I’m hanging by a thread — despite any good that’s happening. I’ve been tempted to cut myself, but haven’t done it. I’m a little proud of myself for resisting.

We should be starting to move soon, and I started an IVF cycle. There’s still going to be a lot of shit going on, but I hope, for the love of all that is holy, no more fucking tragedies.